Elephants 505 Humans 143
July 4th 2009 21:20
In what is believed to be the first cross species competitive eating contest a trio of elephants named Bunny, Susie and Minnie dominated three professional human eaters. Eric "Badlands" Booker, Tim "Gravy" Brown, and Juliet Lee were only able to down 143 hot dogs as compared to the pachyderms' impressive total of 505. Contest organizers called the disappointing result "a setback for humanity." A competitive eating analyst said that the fact that the humans weighed 500 pounds while the elephants tipped the scales at nine tons may have contributed to the outcome.
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